Archive of BMW Motorrad Club Cape (2006 - 2019)

POLITICALLY INCORRECT

MY WIFE HAD A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE ON SUNDAY.
SILLY COW THOUGHT SHE COULD DO THE VACUUMING WHILE THE RUGBY WAS ON.


JUST BOUGHT THE WIFE SOME CROTCH-LESS KNICKERS FOR HALLOWEEN.
NOTHING SEXUAL.
JUST GIVES HER A MUCH BETTER GRIP ON HER BROOMSTICK.


MY MATE ALWAYS CRIES AFTER SEX.
MIND YOU HE IS IN PRISON.


I TREATED THE WIFE TO ONE OF THOSE FISH PEDICURES THE OTHER DAY.
I MUST SAY I’M VERY PLEASED WITH THE RESULTS.
THOSE PIRANHAS DON’T STUFF ABOUT EH!!


COPS STOP A TAXI ON THE MOTORWAY.
COP SAYS: “YOU DO KNOW THE LIMIT IS 70 DONT YOU?”
DRIVER LOOKS IN THE BACK AND SHOUTS “HEAR THAT. TWO OF YOU WILL HAVE TO GET OUT”!!

---------------------------------------------

The Iraqi Rugby Player

The Gauteng Lions manager flies to Baghdad to  watch some young Iraqis playing rugby, is suitably impressed by one of them and arranges for him to come over to Gauteng .

Two months later the Lions are 18-6 down to the Cheetahs with only 20 minutes left to  play. The manager gives  the young Iraqi winger the nod and on he goes.

The lad is a sensation, scores 4 tries in 20 minutes and wins the game for the Lions.

The  fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media  love the new star.

When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in Super 15 Rugby .

“Hello  Mum, guess what?” he says “I played for 20 minutes today, and we were 18-6  down but I scored 4 tries and we won!
Everybody  loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me!”

“Wonderful,” says  his mum, “Let me tell you about my day.
Your  father got shot and wounded in the street and robbed; your sister and I were ambushed and beaten; your  brother has joined a gang of looters and all the while you were having  such a great time playing rugby”

The young lad is very upset. “What can I say Mum, but I am so sorry.”

“Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!’ shrieks his mum, “It’s your fault we all moved to Johannesburg in the first place!”